Either porn emails are becoming more philosophical or I just haven’t read enough porn emails to know the difference. I happened upon one from someone who gave their name as “Abby.” As I was on the phone with Neal, I told him to have his friends stop sending me this nasty stuff. Since the subject was so terribly bad, I had to open the actual email (no images, all text, of course) to find out just how bad the actual message was. Inside I found this little gem:
Adorable young ladies getting hot naked and having sex indoors.
I dreamed a thousand new paths. I woke and walked my old one.Knowledge comes, but wisdom lingers.
So Beautiful… adnominally So young… So innocent…
SEE THEM IN A DIRTY pegmatite PORNTear thyself from delay.
Just look at ever preview.See by your wish own eyes.
Do your duty and leave the rest to heaven.Communism has never come to power in a country that was not disrupted by war or corruption, or both.
So, now, not only do you get the chance to view these women in some weird kind of production, you also get warnings on how to avoid communism from taking over your country! Apparently, if you do your duty and watch porn (from which I infer that heaven wants you to do this, which isn’t what I actually portend myself) that your country will be safe from corruption [of other kinds] and you will be safe from communism. “Tear thyself from delay” and act now!
I bet their evil plan is to get all the men to watch porn all the time so they don’t have time to wage war. *winks* Or, you know, continue the human race at all. That way, not only will we not be disrupted by war, we won’t have to worry about those pesky children running around or future generations falling for communistic plots either.
I often wonder, not just about porn-mailers, but spam-mailers in general: What are they like in real life? Do they have a family that loves them? Do they go out with friends on the weekends? Do they have hopes, desires, dreams? Do they have childhood memories that haunt them? Do they build ships in bottles?
The answer is no, they do not. And I hate them.
Thanks again for helping me with the stories! Your comments were very encouraging. If there is any help you need with anything, or anything I can do for you, just let me know.
Nicholas:
*chuckles* I abhor spam and porn ones in particular. It’s like opening your front door and being greeted by naked people trying to lure you out. Ugh. We shouldn’t be bombarded with this crap at all. I can stop it from coming to my snail mail address but I can’t do a thing about my email, eh? I’ll concur with you, here, that they have no lives and no happy memories to make their lives worthwhile.
Here’s another stupid one that makes even LESS sense than the last one(“charioteer girls”? What the…?):
Adorable young ladies getting always naked and having sex indoors.
The abdication of belief makes the behavior small — better an ignis
fatuus than no illume at all.
Exclusive content. Realy young charioteer girls.
Try out valued now. Don’t lose embryulcia your chance.
Prithee don’t screw your wit beyond the compass of good manners.
See by your have own eyes.
For it is not death or hardship that is a fearful thing, but the fear
of death and hardship.Anybody who gets away with something will come
back to get away with a little bit more.
Also, Nicholas, no problem with the stories. I’m still impressed with your eclectic style and ability to suit your style to the story you feel you need to tell.
the question isnt what are spammers like – the question is… what are people who naively open spam like? are they really that dumb? can someone really exist who can navigate the internet, but NOT know what spam is AND be interested in reading about how VIAGRA will help you consumate your relationship with your MAIL ORDER russian bride?
ok im rusty. ha!
cheers
hooizz